When we were raising our two kids we always taught them to care. Care about the child next to them that didn’t seem to have friends, show care to the student who was being bullied, care on a larger scale about the environment. Our kids knew The Sea Shepherd cause and the plight of the Taji dolphins by the time they were 5.
Care they did and still do. Both are filled with a strong sense of justice, always standing up for the underdog.
Today I am going to tell you about another teaching concerning caring that I would like to pass on to my kids and all of you.
The concept of not caring… Yep you read it right “I do not care.”
In the last 6 months, this concept has resonated with me so much. Let me explain using some examples.
At the start of the year I decided to set some boundaries and put some distance between myself and some friends that had been around me for many, many years. This was tough for me because I knew that what I was doing was going to cause pain. But I was going under. They had not seen the motivation behind what I was doing, and had taken things the wrong way. I also knew that other people within this friendship circle would see me as the bad person; in fact they still do. I needed to do this for myself because being around these people was bringing me down. After some months things settled down. I thought I would try to send a text making sure all was OK, only to be met by a barbed and curt response. Now here is where the “I do not care” comes in. In my mind I have tried to do the right thing. I have tried to be kind and show some compassion. The old me would have had my stomach tied up in knots. The new me says “I don’t care. I have done my best here, time to move along.”
The second scenario involves my oldest. A duplicate of me…on steroids. Wild, chaotic, big hearted and strong willed beyond measure. But so, so beautiful inside and out. About to finish her schooling, she is trying to find her way in life – the next part of the journey. Recently feeling disappointment in people she placed trust in and given her heart to as a true friend only to have it crushed. So…guess what I say here? I want her to think “I don’t care” I have beautiful friends, close friends who love me and are there when things get tough.
As the anxiety in me bubbles to over flowing levels, as my bank account has just enough to pay for a tank of petrol for hubby, as I feel the sting of my past biting me on the ass…I stand up and say “I don’t care.” I have a life that is messy, that is chaotic, but is so full of love that I am blessed. I do not care for the negative, I don’t care for the people who bring me down. I do not care for anyone negative living rent free in my head.
Here is the thing to remember: Let’s care about the good stuff, the stuff that brings us hope and love. Let’s not care about the other stuff…it causes waaay too much grief.
Til next time,