I discovered this as I worked through my own fears and insecurities. 2017 has been both the best and worst year so far. I say worst because I’ve dealt with grief and loss 2 times, close to home and it rocked my world. I felt upended, upside down and all kinds of turned around. As if that wasn’t enough I was in a major car accident and had several other things all happening at the same time. I couldn’t even begin to put into words the magnitude of upheaval this year has brought. However, even with all of that, it has been the best year. I can truthfully say that and wholeheartedly mean it.
How can I still be so encouraged and upbeat after getting my butt whooped by life for the last six months? KINDNESS! Yup, that little simple thing that starts within and resonates out. I found myself in a place of choice. Because I felt this anger rising up in me, I felt that little itch of anger growing and growing. I knew I could either give into it and lose myself in it, OR I could stand true in the lessons I share with everyone else. So, I made a choice in that pivotal moment and I chose to be kind to myself. I recognized that the anger I was feeling came from feeling a lack of control, not understanding why all this crazy stuff kept interrupting my good moments.
I decided that I’d get my control back by acknowledging the hurt and fear I was feeling and I’d give myself grace to just not know how to fix it all. Even as a coach, I have moments of overwhelm and just feeling plain messed up. So, I gave myself kindness to feel it all, to just be in the experience and let the emotions come. I allowed the fear to come up and I sat with it. I even had a conversation with myself, talking to my fear. Then I told myself “It’s OK to be scared, to feel out of control. You’re going to get through it. You don’t have to be strong all the time. It’s OK to feel weak, to feel out of control. This moment shall pass.”
I can’t even tell you how powerful that was. To say it, to feel it, to let it resonate. I sat in kindness and let it envelope me. I describe it like a bubble of peace, calm, serenity and bliss. I call it my “golden bubble” – a space I get into and just let the earth, the universal energy of love and goodness just wrap around me and saturate me.
Now believe me, I know that fear can get all up in your face and have you ready to hide under the bed. It’s alright to be afraid. However, you don’t have to stay in that space. As you are able, give yourself kindness to combat that fear.
Some ways to invite more kindness into yourself:
Reading a favorite book
Listening to a favorite song
Writing affirmations or a gratitude list
Finding a quiet space and just being
Taking a walk in nature
Dancing until you fall in a heap of laughter
Spending time with a great friend or loved one
Treating yourself to a favorite dessert or meal
Wearing a favorite outfit and going somewhere special
Anything that makes you feel good!
So, get your kindness on and conquer those fears. 🙂