Being a parent is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.
My parents were always hands on, sometimes a little too much hands on. I remember once when I was in eighth grade, a boy I liked called my house and my dad answered. He promptly put the kid through the ringer. I was so embarrassed! I promised I would never do that to my kids.
Well it’s happened, hasn’t it. I forgot all about that promise until today. Today has been one of the most emotional days of my life. I have had to say goodbye to my “baby” and start treating her like an adult. You see my job has always been to soak up the hurt, to stand in the middle so that the kids were shielded, to be there to roar when they were in trouble. And yes, this crazy red-haired lady can roar like nobody’s business when someone hurts my kids! When they were much younger I would be there at the school, standing my ground. I always believed that if I wasn’t a voice for my child, then who would be?
Today I did two things that, in my quest to support, love and shield my nearly-adult child, made the situation so much worse. I think back to the day that my Dad intercepted that phone call from my mate, Anthony. I finally get it…he was doing what I did today.
Today was a huge learning curve for me. I had to say, “I don’t like the decision you have made…but it is yours to make.” I had to step away and let the situation fall where it might – watch as a possible mistake was made and be there to pick up the pieces, if need be.
Today I had to say, “This life is yours to live, mistakes and all.” I am so sad. In some way I guess I have never felt so unwanted. Yet, at the same time, I’m proud of the person I have raised.
This parenting gig is so hard!
I raise a glass and cheers to all the parents who have made it out the other end. I would love to hear your experiences.
Namaste until next time