Monday, July 30, 2012

Kindness Comes From a Heart Without Fear

Post by Jodi Lobozzo Aman for the Kind Kindred series.

painting by danielenart on etsy

Kindness Comes From a Heart Without Fear

Cindy is one the kindest person I ever met. Being around her makes me want to sing and dance, I feel so good.

She will see good in me no matter what I am putting out there. Whether I am angry, complaining, or feeling doll-drum. She finds the light, and helps me see it just at that very perfect moment when the darkness is about to eat me up. She tells me how she sees me, pointing to that me, the real me, with her words and heart.

When she sees me, it makes it easier for me to see my true self. And all the bad feelings melt away.

There are people, like Cindy, who shine like stars in a dark sky, people who make you smile when you are around them. Their energy is contagious. You feel warmed by their heart, because it is open. So open that their presence makes you feel like you belong to something special. Indeed, you belong to their heart.

When someone is this open-hearted, it feels different than other relationships. We feel different around them.

All too often fear finds it’s way between two people. It sets up camp and promotes itself playing one person off another in subtle but powerful ways. Fear has us shield our hearts. In attempt to protect ourself, we don’t fully let another in. People who live with fear in their hearts, expect bad things to come and their attention is often grabbed by the negative pieces of a situation, first.

And then, there are people, like Cindy, who open their hearts without fear. Centered and living in joy, they see love everywhere. Even as the "dark" is bouncing up and down shouting “Look at me!” they know how to find the light switch.

One time I took a client on a guided meditation. She was feeling very sad about a predicament in her life and wanted some guidance. She went to her sacred place and met with a spirit guide who gave her a special gift. When we were back together talking about her experience, she said, “Why do we choose to be negative and afraid, when this beauty and support is right there for us?” No truer words were spoken. Why, indeed.

Why expect and see the negative–and live in fear–rather than see and experience the positive?

Cindy is not afraid, she looks around and sees love everywhere. Kindness is an attitude, a decision, a verb. But it is not something you have to do, it is a way to be once you are no longer afraid. As you embody kindness, your actions, thoughts and relationships will reflect this. You'll love, share, and give generously from your heart. And in giving you will receive more than you ever dreamed of.

Jodi Lobozzo Aman is a human being on the path to spiritual wholeness. Her blog Heal Now and Forever Be In Peace is an invitation for you to join her journey. She is a psychotherapist, spiritual director, and life coach, helping people open to new ways of being. Her free e-book What IS UP With Your DOWN? Being Grateful in 7 Easy Steps is available on her website.
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Tina Barbour said...

Hey, Jodi, great post! I would love to be a person like Cindy, because I love to be around people like that too. Which comes first--the kindness or the fearlessness? How do we become open-hearted?

Jodi Lobozzo Aman said...

The fearless always comes first, then there is nothing to do. You are already there. We are all already there, but fear just gets in our way. Also guilt but fear and guilt are really the same if you think about it!
Thanks, Tina for coming over

Nicole Ican said...

I try to be like Cindy, and I know that being like her is the healthier and easier way to live, but I sometimes tend to forget how easy it is and I allow fear and anger and aggressivity to take control. If I ever react with anger whether it's out of frustration or else, the guilt feeling that follows increases the anger, and it becomes a vicious circle.When I treat others with kindness, however they have been treating me, i can have peace of mind.

Tara Beaumont said...

Lovely post Jodi, we definitely need more Cindy's in our world! I find too often that when my loved ones are angry,whiny etc I fall instep with them (I wonder also if this has something to do with mirror neurones?) But, when I can check myself and decide to act with kindness all sorts of cool things happen! For me, it's an active choice, breaking out of old negative patterns.

julia said...

This is so deeply beautiful--thanks so much for sharing, Jodi.   Amanda, thank you for making a sacred space for all of this goodness.  

With gratitude,


Jodi Lobozzo Aman said...

Thank you Julia! I am glad you liked it. It was fantastic sharing the bloggy world with Amanda! 

Jodi Lobozzo Aman said...

We all could be that aware. On good days I can do it, too! It is great to know that it is a choice. We too often close our hearts out of fear. Not helpful! Glad to know you, Tara!

Jodi Lobozzo Aman said...

Nicole, You are beautiful! You are totally like Cindy. You always see the good in people. You just have to show that kindness to yourself! Please, please, please!  

Jodi Lobozzo Aman said...

Thanks, Amanda, for such a great opportunity to join you here on Kindness Over Matter and inspire people with Cindy's beautiful heart. The beat spreads like ripple around a drop.

Bridget said...

Kindness is a verb. I like that, so true!

Nicole Ican said...

Thank you very much Jodi :)
I think that now I might learn how to be kind to myself, maybe it can start now. I hope so.
In fact, with your help, it is really improving :)
Thank you, much love <3

Jodi Lobozzo Aman said...

Thanks, Bridget! We gots to keep on keeping on! 

Jodi Lobozzo Aman said...

Yes, please!
Love right back atcha!

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